You hear that phrase a lot when discussing sexual behavior: consenting adults. “What consenting adults do is between them.” “Anything is fine as long as it’s happening between consenting adults.” And so on.
What does it meant to consent though? Why is it so many people think it “disrupts the flow” or “isn’t sexy”… and so on? The fact that people need to be taught was consent looks like and sounds like suggests people either don’t or can’t talk about it the way it needs to be discussed to keep an experience happy and pleasurable for everyone.
It is not as simple as respecting “no means no” though that is a good place to start as shown in this excerpt from We Three:
Jess hesitated. “Are we still taking photos?”
“I hope so.” Eric added, “But there’s no reason we can’t eat, or have a swim?”
Jess shook her head. “Where exactly are we going?”
“My equipment’s all at the house.”
“So, the number you gave me was…?”
“My house, yes.” Eric held the door for her as they started out to the parking lot. He blocked her way, and his expression was serious. Jess relaxed further with every word he spoke.
“Look, if you’re not into something, you say no. At any time. I can go home now and leave you here. But honestly, I’d like to get to know you more. Elena would, too.”
“You picked me up in a bar,” Jess pointed out.
“Technically it was a photo gallery, and yes, I think you’re very sexy,” Eric pointed out. “I know you also are into Elena. So, I thought I’d bring you together. See what magic happens.”
Jess asked, “What do you get out of this?”
“A new friend, and maybe a few pretty pictures,” he answered. “Nothing more is expected.” After a moment, he checked again. “So? You okay?”
IMHO, consent is very, very sexy. Asking and telling someone what you want can make an experience better. To see what I mean, enjoy this excerpt from my novel
(NSFW excerpt follows the break)
Then Elena knelt between Jess’s thighs, caressing and stroking Jess’s pussy lips. Watching Elena’s gaze devouring her made Jess’s breath catch, the look was so hungry. Then the heated brown gaze lifted to find hers.
“Can I?” Elena asked.
Jess blinked. “What was the question?”
Elena laughed; Jess’s heart flipped with the sound. “Can I have you?” Elena clarified. Her dark lips held an intense smile that reached through her eyes and seemed to hold Jess by the throat, tightening it. The husky accented words effectively seduced her. Jess was thoroughly on board with being seduced. She nodded.
Elena’s fingers dipped and circled on Jess’s inner thighs, close but not touching. “I want…. I need… to hear you,” Elena said.
Jess swallowed, then cleared her throat and nodded. “Yes,” she breathed.
Following the given permission, Elena lowered her head and flicked her tongue lightly across the hood covering Jess’s clit. She gasped, but then sighed when Elena settled in with long strokes over all her folds. Each upsweep of the other woman’s tongue ended with short, tight pulls on her clit with her full lips. The woman’s hands continued massaging Jess’s thighs, then draped them over Elena’s shoulders. Elena’s tongue plunged into her with determination.
Jess writhed and cried out through the lapping waves of pleasure. Elena chuckled against her flesh. Each time the sound vibrated into Jess’s sex, making her clench her thighs against Elena’s head.
Jess’s fingers threaded into soft satin hair. The sensation grounded her at the same time two of Elena’s fingers pressed inside, curled upward, and stroked Jess intimately. Elena sucked at Jess’s folds while she pumped her fingers. Jess heard the sucking sounds from her muscles trying to grasp hold of Elena’s fingers, and pulled her own thighs back, opening herself and looking down at the dark head between her thighs. “Deeper, more,” she murmured when Elena met her eyes, nose buried in the light hairs on Jess’s mound.
Elena smiled, and, shifting to add a third finger, continued to pump. Knowing her actions turned Jess on, Elena fluttered her tongue against Jess’s clit where she could see the action. Then she lifted her head, replaced her tongue with her thumb, and said, “I want to watch you come, Jess.” Jess swallowed as Elena stilled her hand, thumb resting just alongside her throbbing clit. Uncontrollably, a whimper passed her lips. “Will you?”
My novel We Three: One and One and One Makes Three arrives in online retailers February 1, 2019.